“I can’t change. I’ve always been this way!” “Is that so?” This is where the conversation begins. What is that thing that stops you from pursuing the change you want? Guilt? Lack of self-confidence? Usually it’s the fear of change itself. You never know exactly where it will lead. Eventually, you reach your limit. Fear or no fear you just have to move forward. That’s where my clients are at when they reach out to me. Cathy for example, could no longer hide that she felt insignificant and unheard. Deep down she thought she didn’t deserve a better life. And
When we’re growing up our role models—usually our parents—provide and teach us about love and respect. We need these qualities to develop self-respect, self-worth, confidence and trust. To the extent that we understand them we know how to relate to others. We know what we deserve in our relationships. If your parents didn’t show each other affection, respect and kindness you may not have learned what a healthy happy relationship looks like. As an adult you could be accepting the unacceptable in your own relationship without even knowing it. Research shows that healthy relationships lower the risk of cardiovascular disease,
What do you do when you are unhappy? Plan a vacation, eat ice cream, find some other distraction? But what if your unhappiness comes from you and not someone or something else? When you ask these 5 questions, you may see sides of yourself you didn’t know were there. That’s a good thing! Awareness is everything. You may be avoiding some truths that could be holding you back from the fulfilling life you want. If those fixes don’t last, you need a clearer picture of what’s going on and how to find the happiness you deserve. We all feel unhappy
Two weeks ago I had one of the most beautiful and heartbreaking conversations of my life. The phone rang and it was my friend Lynn. In a soft clear voice she said, “You’re the only person I’m calling before I go into palliative care. I wanted to talk to you because I love you and because we had such a special relationship.” It took me a while to say what we both knew. “You mean you’re saying, ‘Goodbye?’” “Yes,” she said firmly. “I wanted to do it privately.” When It All Started. We talked about the ways we loved and
Have you ever felt angry and grateful at the same time? It was fifteen years ago that I joined a clinical trial for a new MS drug. With no cure in sight and no acceptable drugs on the market, my only hope was to be a guinea pig and pray for a miracle. I was guided through it for nine months by a pleasant young woman. It was an arduous process involving countless blood-takings, infusions and MRIs, as well as motor tests and interviews. We spent a lot of time together. I felt cared for. One day a new frightening
One of the things I do is help people listen to their gut—something I wish I’d done back in 1992 during a particularly challenging transition in my life. Instead, I let fear guide me to make poor decisions. I was a single mom raising my three small children after their father moved far away, completely removed from their daily lives. Life was more stable at home but I agonized over the psychological and emotional consequences of being left and growing up without their father. I tried to fill the void, but it wasn’t realistic, I couldn’t be mom and dad.